28 June 2007

Stuck in a rut

Lately I've been spending a lot of time sitting around the house and staring off into space, thinking and worrying about far too many things for my own good. There are times when your thinking gets beyond you, to the point where you feel immobilized by all the questions that your mind has managed to scavenge from who-knows-where. Summer break is always one of those times.

On top of trying to figure out what to do with myself for a gap year after I graduate from school next year, I am also struggling to focus on studying for the test of all tests. Aggggg. Days begin shortly after noon, once I've mustered enough energy to boost myself out of morning stupor (I start the summer waking up early, and slowly, somehow, I always end the summer waking up well into mid-day). After a few hours of re-learning all the concepts I learned in all my general science courses, I get frustrated for the day and end up on the couch reading a novel instead (I've read some really good ones lately, like The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down, and am now reading The Namesake. Can't wait for Harry Potter. Ohhh books). Then after several hours of reading, I realize it's already evening, and I've wasted away most of the day without thinking about my post-grad plans, or even thinking about thinking about them. And then I sit and stare, stuck in a feeling of immobility, until the TV provides me with a welcome distraction for the rest of the night.

Maybe it's too early for me to be worrying about what I'm going to do after I graduate (it really isn't, at least not for the track I'm headed on--premeds are expected to have everything planned out to the umpteenth degree, that's just how the application process works. Blah AMCAS.). Anyhow, the things I really want to do require that I apply within the next two months.

If I can get through this summer with some MCAT scores I can be satisfied with, and an idea of what I am doing after I graduate, I will be so ecstatic.


At June 19, 2011 8:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I totally feel you. I'm in the same spot.


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